In Search of Lost Time
by littlepiggi
Summary: DracoxOC. Draco finds himself missing bits and pieces of his life due to a girl named Ana. As he endures the war and his part in it, his longing to fill the missing parts of his memories grows larger and the mystery becomes more complicated.
1. Chapter 1

He found himself trembling in his seat. He was in the Potions Dungeons, but he didn't remember how he got there or why he was there to begin with. There was nobody sitting in the same row as him, and there was no professor behind the front desk. With a quivering hand he reached up to find that his face was soaked in a mixture of sweat and tears. He couldn't possibly imagine just what the fuck was going on because he was in such a mindreeling daze. He turned around and jolted out of his seat, the clatter of his falling chair echoing awkwardly in the dungeon. The thing that had startled him so severely was a girl, a girl who looked like nothing special, but most certainly did not look normal in any way.

She had her wand pointed at him, gripped in a shaking hand. Reactively, he whipped out his wand and shouted.

"_Stupefy_!"

She flew back several feet, her body slamming against the wall as the wand fell from her limp fingers. Draco felt himself still trembling as he walked to her, his knees feeling reminiscent of jelly as he knelt down beside her to get a better look at the girl. He didn't recognize her.

Her eyes were puffy and red from crying, her tears still fresh and glistening upon her cheeks. He didn't recognize this girl, but her robes told him she was in Gryffindor and he smirked, dropping any previous sense of guilt he had had about stupefying a girl whom he had never met before. He looked around, somewhat intrigued by the fact that she had no books or bag with her. She had short black hair, seemingly cut by an amateur with a dull pair of scissors, the edges of her hair were jagged and uneven, her skin was pale and her long eyelashes began to flutter as she started to regain some consciousness.

Before she could fully regain it, Draco tapped his wand against her, little vines sprouting from the tip of his wand and wrapping her wrists together in a tight bond. Draco was concerned with one thing, himself.

_How did I get here?_ he thought.

_Why am I here? _ he thought next.

_And why did I turn to find a girl with her wand point at my back? _ he thought last.

There were more questions though as he wiped his face on his sleeve. What predicament had he been in to suddenly be aware and find himself alone in a dungeon, sweating and crying? And just why, could he not remember for the life of him, how he had gotten there?

"Nnngrh..." the girl groaned, beginning to stir as she opened her eyes to focus on him. When she saw Draco, she immediately started to move, but found herself so inconveniently trapped by his vine-bonds. Draco took a twisted sense of joy in seeing her panicked face. At least between the two of him, he wasn't the only one confused about the current situation. He hated not knowing what the fuck was going on. In fact, he hated realizing that he had no idea what the fuck was going on with somebody he didn't know pointing a wand at his fucking back.

"It's pointless to struggle. You should start explaining. Who are you?" He asked her, the smug little smirk never leaving his face. He couldn't really understand why though, when he spoke that her mouth fell open in a shock, her lips parted slightly and her eyes stared at him under a blank, glazed cover. He grabbed a fistful of her hair and brought her closer to his face. There was nothing gentle about his grasp nor his pull, her slight yelp was proof of that. Draco had no patience at the moment. His absolute ignorance of what was going had terminated his patience.

"I asked you a question you little shit, answer me!" He shouted into her face and again, she didn't show fear. This time her brows furrowed as if sad and he could see tears welling up in the girl's eyes. Draco growled, too frustrated to want to deal with a crying girl. He closed his eyes for a moment, trying to be calm, trying not to lose it and hit the idiot girl in the face like he wanted.

_Why, why does she stare at me so dumbfounded? She was the one pointing the wand! If anyone should have that expression on his face, it's me!_

"Look you idiot-"

"Mister Malfoy...Miss Lee..._what, _may I ask is the reason for the two of you gracing Professor Slughorn's classroom at this time?" The foreboding voice of Professor Snape loomed over them and Draco looked up slowly, unsure of how to answer or continue with the situation at hand.

"Professor I-"

"And you have tied up a fellow student Mister Malfoy. Though I commend you on your clever usage of the spell, I shall remind you that magic between classes is prohibited."

"Professor-"

"Not another word Mister Malfoy or I'll be taking points. Miss Lee, I believe you have my class next, so I recommend you run along." and with that, much to Draco's dismay, Professor Snape flicked his wand and the vines disappeared. Without a moment's hesitation the girl stood up, scrambling to her feet and grabbing her wand that had dropped several feet away from her. Draco stood up quickly, reaching out to grab her but the professor stepped in his way, leering down at him.

"Mister Malfoy, to your seat."

"Professor-"

"To. Your. Seat."

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Her breaths came out jagged an uneven, desperate and gasping for the air that just wasn't enough. In the silence of the empty dormitories, her breathing resembled yelps and her sobs sounded more like screams. Even muffled by a pillow, her crying resounded too loudly in the unnaturally quiet room.

The other students were all at class, being good, obedient students. But she couldn't bring herself to step a foot outside of her bed. She barely bring herself to open her eyes. The tear-soaked pillow felt as if it were drowning her, the salty dampness barricading her breaths to herself. And in some way, the lack of fresh air and the simulated feeling of drowning gave comfort in her suffering. She was indeed drowning, her thoughts flashing and twisting within her mind without any sort of coherency. Most of her insides were twisting actually, twisting, turning, fragmenting and breaking away into nothing only to pull itself together and repeat the entire process all over again.

It burned. The bedsheets burned, the pillow burned, even the very warmth of her own breath burned. Her fingers could not scratch hard enough and no matter how much she clenched, the frustration with which she clenched her fists wasn't nearly enough to content her. She wanted to clench her fists harder, she wanted to dig her nails in deeper till the palms of her hands bled. But she didn't have the strength to do so, and so she was left unsatisfied in her sobbing.

And her aching heart.

Oh how it ached. How it shook inside her chest with such loneliness; with such sadness.

She never knew how much it would affect her. She honestly hadn't expected the aching she felt then. The pain had caught her off guard like a blow to her face and it stayed with her like a cancer, only getting worse with every passing second and bringing with it the feeling of an inevitable death.

This ache, she would never forget.

She would hold this pain as the standard to all other pain. Anything that followed after this could not possibly be on par with what she felt at that moment.

So if she could survive this, then she sincerely believed that she could survive anything.

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Luna Lovegood was a girl of oddities and marvels. She herself wasn't aware of it, nor was she ever really aware of it. It's not that she was a dumb girl, or that she was just that ignorant, it was simply because she did not care to be aware of it. She was generally happy with herself and today was no exception. She hummed to herself as she walked on the grass, holding her lunch in one hand and an empty jar in the other. She knew today was a good day to come across the ever-so-elusive Marblebees. Her father had just published an article in Quibbler last Saturday and she was eager to find them. She looked up around the outside grounds to see a particular somebody sitting underneath the shade of an evergreen. Luna felt her happy day become even happier.

"Hello Ana." Luna said in her usual airy voice, but despite this she began to feel concerned at the heaviness of the air. A glance at her face confirmed it. She looked like the undead, the bags under her eyes prominent and her gaze unfocused and unclear. Luna suspected foul play by the Blarnjer Gnomes, but she couldn't be too sure. When Ana waved her hand in response, Luna took a seat next to her, pretending not to take notice of the mutilated buttercup petals that concentrated where Ana sat. Instead, she took out her sandwich and held up the other half to Ana.

"Sandwich? You seem as if you had been cursed by the Blarnjer Gnomes." She said thoughtfully, but Ana shook her head, holding up her hand to reject the sandwich. She retracted the sandwich and began chewing it, looking over the Hogwarts Lake which shimmered underneath the generous sunlight.

"No thanks Luna. I think I read about Blarnjer Gnomes once." She said softly and Luna lit up, excited to hear that Ana recalled the article.

"Oh yes! Father published it in the Quibbler last year, back in December." She stated, taking another mouthful of sandwich and looking at Ana. Unnerving her slightly, Ana seemed to be staring off into space still, her fingers methodically plucking off the petals from buttercups one by one.

"I recall now. They are tiny gnomes that get into your brain through your ears..and they grow in your brain, making your mind heavy with...um.."

"Unpleasant thoughts!" Luna chimed in for her, nodding and dusting the crumbs off of her hands to open the empty jar. She lifted it up and let the narrow beams of sunlight which made it through the shelter of tree leaves shine through it, enjoying the way it glinted off of the smooth glass. Indeed this was a fine jar for catching Marblebees, the glass was just the right thickness and size. "They grow and weigh your mind down with unpleasant thoughts. Awfully bothersome those Blarnjer Gnomes."

"How do you get rid of Blarnjer Gnomes Luna?" She asked her and Luna smiled her sweet little smile, putting the jar down and picking up some of the torn buttercup petals to put into the jar. Marblebees would probably like it best were there some nature to make it feel like home. She put her hands into the jar to compact the petals and grass down to the bottom more.

"Do you feel something weighing down on your mind Ana?" The question seemed innocent enough, but Luna trusted her friend to know better. And without fail, Ana picked up on the depth of the question, pausing momentarily in her buttercup destruction and a small smile beginning to curve her lips. The reaction made Luna feel a little lighter, happy that her best friend wasn't completely out of it.

"It sure feels like it. It feels like there are at least a hundred of them inside. Please Luna, tell me how to get rid of the Blarnjer Gnomes?" Ana asked her in such a saddened voice that Luna momentarily forgot about her mission to catch the Marblebees. She turned to Ana, almost being able to feel her pain from sitting next to her at such close proximity. She smiled her trademark hazy smile at her and started waving her wand in the air, swishing and flicking as if she were casting spells, but nothing was happening.

"I suppose the best way would be to drown them out." She replied and Ana arched an eyebrow, finally turning to meet Luna's gaze. Luna smiled still and continued with her swishing and flicking movements.

"Drown them out? How so?"

"Why, with music of course." She answered. Luna couldn't imagine what else you could possibly drown out things from your mind with. Water would just be illogical after all. And so she started to hum and the look in Ana's eyes told her that she finally understood Luna's movements. Luna was pretending to compose a song, a fantastic and brilliant song. She imagined the song to go along the lines of the thing she was humming. Ana smiled at her, scooted a little closer and closed her eyes to Luna's humming.

Luna continued humming, lowering her swish and flick movements to a standstill at her side. The warmth that now sat against her now felt like the warmth of her friend and no longer like the heat of a thousand frantic thoughts. Perhaps the Marblebees would have to wait another day to be caught.

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	2. Chapter 2

For the next week and a half Ana functioned on autopilot. Meals were eaten at the time they were supposed to, classes were attended, homework was done 50% of the time-it was a real coin toss on that one really. For this week she had avoided speaking to anyone and everyone, even Luna, to whom she had confided in her greatest secret, the reason why it was too much of an effort to exist. Luna occasionally owled her something, a package, a letter, pages of the Quibbler, but she never pushed for Ana to talk. Ana appreciated that most of all. She appreciated not being forced to speak.

"Ms. Lee, how many Trossem roots go into the alternative Sleeping Draught?"

"I do not know Professor." She responded automatically, not even bothering to look up when asked. She could hear his audible sigh right before he clapped his hands.

"I bet I know someone who does! Mister Potter! My star student thus far, how many Trossem roots go into the alternative Sleeping Draught?"

"I believe 3 sir."

"Excellent! 5 points to Gryffindor! Now, we shall partner up..." She drowned out the rest of what he was saying. There was an uneven number of Gryffindors in Potions class, so whenever there was a 'partner up' period, Ana had always contented herself by doing her project solo.

"Oh dear, where's Mister Longbottom?"

"He's in the Hospital Wing with a case of Muttelwarts sir." Hermione Granger said and it was around the time Ana began to pay attention.

"Ah. How unfortunate. Well Ms. Granger, if you would so kindly partner up with Ms. Lee here."

"Yes Professor."

_Yes Professor. Of course Professor. I'm Hermione Granger Professor. I'm perfect in every way Professor. _

Without thinking she had let out an audible sigh, catching the attention of her fellow Gryffindor. But being the nice girl she was, Hermione ignored it, offering her a smile as she put her books down next to Ana.

"Hi Ana. How do you want to split the work? I was thinking that you could slice up the ginger roots and I'll crush the beatleworms first."

"Ok." That's all Ana had to offer. Wordlessly she began doing as Hermione said, not paying attention to the amount and leaving that to the girl wonder. In fact, she began to prepare more of the other ingredients as Hermione handled the more difficult part of putting it together. There was a heavy silence between them, something Ana ignored, knowing that Hermione wanted to attempt some sort of small talk. The initiation for the small talk would come any moment now. 1...2...3...

"So I remember you used to have really long hair. Why'd you cut it?" Honestly, she was slightly surprised that Hermione Granger would even take notice of such a detail. But she shrugged her shoulders, not really wanting to carry a conversation.

"It was time for a change I guess."

"But your hair used to be so beautiful." She added, again surprising Ana with her commentary. Again she shrugged.

After successfully avoiding conversation for the rest of the potion, she laid her head against the table, uninterested in the results of the grades of each potion. As Slughorn praised Harry Potter's to be the best, she grinned inside at the redness creeping up Hermione Granger's face. Hermione was obviously not used to coming in second in _any _subject.

_She should hang out with me more. She'd be happy to get even an __**average**__ grade._

"Excellent work students! Class dismissed."

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"Ron you're going to choke if you don't learn how to chew your food."

"Like this 'mione?" He cheekily opened his mouth, giving Hermione a full view of his masticated food. She rolled her eyes and returned to eating from her own plate, occasionally glancing at the very end of the Gryffindor tables.

"Hermione why do you keep looking over there?" Harry asked, being only slightly more perceptive than Ron Weasley at this point in time. Hermione bit her lip before throwing another glance towards the end.

"You know that girl who hangs out with Luna a lot? Anabelle Lee?"

"Uh...I've seen her around. She doesn't really hang out with anyone though, besides Luna." He answered, now also looking her way. "Wasn't her hair really long before?"

"Yeah. She cut it. But I'm wondering if you know anything about her."

"I know something." Ron piped up, mouth full of food. Taking a swig of pumpkin juice he wiped his mouth on his sleeve, much to her annoyance, and pointed a fork at Ana down at the end of the tables.

"Well...?" Hermione jabbed him in the ribs with her elbow, not really in the mood for his teasing. He grimaced at her jab before continuing.

"Last year, there were rumors going around that she had a very serious relationship with a Slytherin."

"Yeah so? What's the big deal about that?" She asked and Ron shook his head.

"Not just any Slytherin," He took another forkful of chicken into his mouth, "Malfoy."

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It had been over a month since that day.

And she still couldn't get over it.

As she lay against the piano, her fingers stroked random keys mindlessly, much to the chagrin of her music professor. But her professor ignored it for now, looking over Ana's composition, skimming the scribbly handwriting and notes that were scratched out and redone in random places. Despite the consistent messiness of her homework, Ana knew that the professor wouldn't care too much. Professor Ivanov always chewed her out for it, but never docked off points in the end-she liked her work too much.

After a few more minutes of reviewing her work, Professor Ivanov put it down in front of Ana, ignoring the fact that her face was plastered against the piano keys.

"You did not put ze ending. Do you not know how you vant zis to end?"

"No. I don't know." She pushed the D-sharp key a few times, ignoring the fact that it annoyed her.

"Vell, do you vant to show me how it zounds so far?"

"No. Not really."

Professor Ivanov let out a frustrated sigh, crossing her arms in a no-nonsense manner. Begrudgingly, Ana sat up and stared at her scribbled sheet music. She didn't even want to play the beginning. She didn't want to play it at all. Stretching her hands out, she gently placed them on the keys, trying to remember what she felt as she was writing the music.

It began with a very gentle touch. It was very sweet how it started out, like the beginning of rain, gently drumming against a window. The movement was smooth, slowly but surely, building up into something more.

As her fingers flit across the keys, her heart started to feel heavier. This was the part where the rain started to pour and where the ground beneath her feet disappeared. In this part of the movement she was thrown into the middle of a pit of quicksand, left to drown and suffocate as it stormed around her. Her arms were trying to keep her afloat, but it really was pointless and the more she tried to stay afloat, the faster she seemed to go down. It was hopeless, it felt hopeless. At this point she had given up trying to get out and accepted her fate. Her body sank slowly and just before her head became submerged, she didn't even bother to take a last breath.

The sand and water filled her lungs and the pressure around her began to crush her chest. She sank inch by inch, until the very tips of her finger could no longer be seen above the surface. As the sand swallowed her up, the surface was left unmarked, as if nothing had happened to begin with. The storm continued on without her.

And that was the end of her sheet music.

She hadn't composed past that and when she turned to look for her professor's reaction, she saw her professor with her face buried in her hands.

"Zer iz no closure to zis piece." Is what she said with her face still in her hands. This was her position for when she was in deep thought.

"I know. I haven't thought of the ending yet."

"You need to have closure."

"I know."

"Class iz over. I vill see you Thursday." Recently this how Professor Ivanov had been ending their lessons. She had been ending them abruptly and quickly after playing one piece. She had not received any negative feedback, so Ana had not pushed the matter. Besides, it meant she got to leave class early. As she walked down the hallway, she stared at her feet, counting the steps it took to get her from the music room to-_**oomph!**_

She had walked headfirst into something solid and stumbled backwards, being caught right at the scruff of her collar by a very rough hand.

"Oh I'm so sorry I wasn't watching-" She stopped mid-sentence as she was pulled forward to straighten herself out, staring into a pair of familiar grey eyes. He roughly shoved her away and all she could think to do was to look at her feet and mumble an apology.

"What are you doing in the hallways during class time?" Oh right, he had been made a prefect. She had the liberty of stumbling into him during his prefect rounds.

"I was excused early by Professor Ivanov..." She mumbled, still staring at her feet.

"Likely story, 5 points from Gryffindor for wandering the halls unexcused." He said snidely and Ana knew him well enough not to respond. Trying to defend yourself would only make things worse when it came to Draco Malfoy.

"Yes sir." Was all she said, but for some reason this actually seemed to bother Draco. He grabbed the collar of her shirt and with one swift movement pushed her against the wall-well, _slammed_, was more like it. For a brief moment she saw stars as her head hit the wall but Draco wasn't exactly a sympathetic person.

"You're hiding something from me." He hissed at her and her eyes grew wide in fear. She finally looked at him, terrified and unsure of her position. What was he referencing? Was he referencing **that** day? Or was he referencing the fact that she was let out of class early? Or was he referencing something else? Did he get wind of some sort of information?

These thoughts sprinted through her head in flashes as she stared into his eyes. She was immobilized out of fear and apprehension, not knowing what the most logical move should be.

"I don't remember a _thing_ about you but I'm told that we were Potions partners for the entirety of last year. How come I don't remember that?"

Oh geez.

"I-I I don't know. Maybe someone gave you incorrect information or-"

"Stop _lying_ to me!" He shouted at her, screamed, more like, and slammed his hand against the wall a couple inches away from her head. She held her breath, seeing the confusion clear in his eyes. He was stressed. He was beyond stressed. He was terrified and on the brink of breaking down. The bags under his eyes told her he wasn't sleeping and the paleness of his skin told her he hadn't gone outside to enjoy the weather either. The way his arm shook as his hand pressed against the wall told her he was exhausted.

"Draco, please." She found herself saying, in the same soothing way she used to. This seemed to throw him off for a moment, his eyes widening for a second right before his grip on her collar tightened.

"Saying my name with such familiarity? _Tell me what you're fucking hiding from me._"

"P-please I-"

"Hey Malfoy! Go pick on someone your own size!"

She guessed if she were to ever have a savior, it would have to be him.

"Mind your own bloody business Potter." He spat out, but let go of his grip on her. With a pointed look at her he turned around and stormed down the hallway until he was out of sight. Ana knew what that look meant.

_We are not done here._

"Are you alright?"

She looked at the one and only Harry Potter who was looking at her with concern written all over his face. She managed a smile as she straightened out her collar and cleared her throat.

"Heh..I uh...Slytherins sure have a nasty temper huh?" She offered weakly, but it seemed that Harry Potter was suspicious of her as well.

"I haven't seen Malfoy pick on a particular person like that apart from...well, me. Or my friends. What'd you do to piss the git off?" He asked lightly while picking up a book she had dropped during the encounter. She shrugged and accepted his help, gathering her papers off of the ground.

"I must have struck a chord with him. Who knows."

"Oh I thought that it might have had something to do with the rumors." She froze at that, grabbing her books and straightening up abruptly. She stared at him, trying to find some sort of answer in his expression.

"What rumors?" She asked, defensive and incredibly apprehensive as to where this conversation was going. He seemed embarrassed all of a sudden, running a hand through his hair nervously.

"Uh...that you dated him."

"Oh. Interesting." She wasn't a very good liar. So she didn't try. Harry seemed intrigued by her answer.

"So..you did?"

"That's none of your business Harry."

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"She has some connection with Draco." Harry said as he sat down at the Great Hall with Ron and Hermione. Giving each other a quick look they leaned in closer so as to keep the conversation between themselves.

"Why? How'd you find out?" Hermione asked and Harry leaned in closer.

"You know how McGonagall let me out of Transfiguration early so that I could deliver something to Slughorn? On the way back I saw Draco holding her up against a wall and boy was he pissed at her." Hermione bit her bottom lip in thought as Ron thoughtfully chewed his burger.

"Were you able to hear what the conversation was?" She asked and Harry shook his head.

"Only a piece. Apparently she's hiding something from him. I don't know what and he doesn't either."

"You think...you think she's on," Ron leaned in even closer and whispered, "_You-Know-Who's_ side?" Harry immediately shook his head. If there was anything he could gauge from the girl, it definitely wasn't that.

"Luna would know. Luna wouldn't be friends with someone like that. And she doesn't seem, um, evil. Just.."

"Unhappy?" Volunteered Hermione and he nodded in agreement. That was it. She was unhappy.

"Well I don't think she's that important really. Harry, I know what you're thinking." Hermione said sternly to him and he blinked in surprise, feigning innocence as he stared blankly at her.

"I don't know what you're talking about Hermione." He lied. She glared at him.

"I do. You want to see if you can use her to get to Draco. I'm telling you Harry, he's not a Death Eater." She said in a huff and Harry blushed lightly, his intentions being all too transparent to the clever girl.

"He is, I know he is. You're too optimistic." She rolled her eyes at him, and sliced into her dinner while shaking her head.

"Well there are a couple of things you should think about. One, where is she now? She hasn't shown up for dinner. And two, I will actually be tutoring her once a week in potions. Professor Slughorn has asked me to help her out since her grades seem to have slipped off. So I won't promise anything, but I'll let you know if I find anything out."

"Hermione, you're bloody brilliant."

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"You haven't been eating much." Luna commented gently, braiding her own hair as she dipped her feet into the lake. Ana contented herself by sitting huddled near the edge of the water.

"I haven't been hungry." She answered, taking a stick and dragging it across the soft ground. Luna looked at her in concern, finishing off her braid.

"You don't look well. I don't want you to be sick. The Plumbucks are known to go after sick women and infect their brains. It would be a shame if the Plumbucks did that to you. I would be awfully lonely without you." Her statement was innocent enough, but a pang of guilt went through Ana as she listened to Luna's last statement. She knew how often that girl was bullied through more passive-aggressive methods by members of her own house. Last Christmas, Luna and her had spent 5 hours looking for the locket her father had sent her.

"You think he'll find out Luna?" She asked her friend, drawing an 'O' in the ground.

"Only if you want him to. Nobody knows the truth besides you and me." If she had to be honest, a part of Ana wanted him to find out. She wanted him to find out. She wanted things to go back to the way they were. But she had made a promise to him. She shivered, a chill going through the air. Then again, that was to be expected in the middle of November. In fact, it was getting a bit too cold to be hanging outside, but she humored Luna. Luna loved to be outside.

"I miss him."

"I know."

"This war won't be ending anytime soon, and here I am, a lovesick teenager whining about a boy. I sure have my priorities straight huh?" She joked to herself, but it wasn't something that got past Luna. Luna gently put a hand on Ana's and squeezed it gently.

"Maybe it's time to distract yourself with someone else?" She suggested and Ana found herself horrified at the thought.

_Somebody else?_

"I..I don't think I could."

"Sure you could. You just don't want to."

Luna's words would burn into her memory for the next few weeks.

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"Ana, this is the fourth time we've gone over this. Do you not study at all?"

"No. Not really." She answered honestly to the frustrated Gryffindor. She felt guilty at the expression on Hermione's face. Hermione sighed, rubbing her temple as she put down the quill in her other hand.

"Don't you care about your future at all? The O.W.L.s are coming up and you're not in the least bit prepared."

"Do you want my honest answer?"

"Something tells me I don't." Hermione said defeatedly, looking over Ana's abysmal homework.

"If it makes you feel better Hermione, I'm like this with all subjects. I think Slughorn was just tired of marking all those red circles on my homework papers, so he asked you to help." Hermione looked aghast at her statement, her eyes full of disbelief as she stared at Ana.

"What? You're like this with all of your subjects? Is there _anything_ that you put effort towards?" She asked and Ana wasn't sure whether or not that question was rhetorical, but she had a feeling that it wasn't.

"Well...there is one thing."

"And what's that?"

"I like to play the piano." Of all answers, that one was obviously not the one Hermione was expecting. She shook her head in disbelief and began to pack her stuff, shaking her head the whole time.

"You're just as bad as Ron I swear. Here, I made you a study guide for what we've covered in class so far. Try to take a look at it. We'll go over it next week."

"Hermione, you shouldn't bother, honestly. I'm a lost cause." She said, not really intending to be so blunt. Hermione shouldered her backpack and gave her this...this _look_ and Ana immediately felt like she was a 5 year old who had just disappointed her mother.

"I'm not doing it just to tutor you in Potions."

"Then why are you doing this?"

"Because it's obvious that you're really lonely."

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"Did you find anything out Hermione?"

"Calm down Harry, it's just the first session. She barely talked to me throughout the whole thing."

"Maybe we can ask Luna-"

"You should give up that idea. I already asked Luna, and Luna claims to not know what I was talking about."

"Well maybe I can try-"

"Harry, you need to be patient. Nobody spills their secrets on the first day."

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_A distraction. _

Who could possibly be a distraction? Nobody even compared to _him_.

But even more interesting was the news Luna had brought to her. Hermione had been asking Luna about her and Draco.

Apparently the Golden Trio was trying to investigate her.

She scribbled over her sheet music. The ending wasn't coming easily. She couldn't understand why she couldn't find the ending. So she amused herself with making new songs, small, short ones. Frustrated she groaned and stuffed the parchments into her backpack, feeling that she had done as much homework as she was capable of for the day. When she stuffed her books into her backpack she caught sight of a familiar brown-haired boy, who seemed to be flipping mindlessly through the pages of an incredibly large book.

For a moment, she found herself a distraction.

Some entertainment at the very least.

She quietly sat down across from him, but despite her silence, he noticed her right away, blinking in surprise for a second before offering her a shy smile.

"Uh hi. Hi Ana."

"Hi Harry. Are you busy?" She asked, leaning her chin on her hand as she stared at the boy. He was stressed too. She could see it in his eyes as well. He laughed nervously and ran a hand through his hair-a habit she had immediately picked up on from their very first encounter.

"No, not really. Just sort of browsing around I guess."

"Can I ask you a question Harry?" He seemed surprised for a moment and nodded, offering a handsome smile.

"Yeah, sure. Of course."

"Why are you and your friends investigating me?" She asked, kicking herself in the head for not being tactful. She was never very good at tact. Harry nearly ripped the page of the book that was in his hand, having been caught off guard. He coughed nervously and pushed his glasses up, rearranging them as if they had been askew. She stared at him, refusing to break eye contact, and he stared back at her, as if looking for some other sort of answer in her own gaze. He didn't find anything.

"What is your relationship with Draco?" He asked. Apparently he wasn't very good at being subtle either.

_Well, that's one thing we have in common._

"I don't have any sort of relationship with Draco. He barely knows my name." Technically, it was true.

"What about those rumors that you were dating him?" And for a moment, Ana faltered, clenching her fist under the table. But she smiled, pretending to be casual as she forced out a natural sounding laugh.

"Harry...what about the rumors about you? I heard Laurie was pregnant with your child two different times this year. I even heard that you were in a love triangle between Padma and Rachel. My favorite rumor is that you don't have a girlfriend because you fancy men." The deep shade of red which flushed his face was more than worth it. He immediately ran his hand through his hair a couple times before mumbling something barely coherent.

"Those are just stupid rumors." He mumbled, embarrassed and obviously familiar with the rumors circulating around him.

"Yes. Just stupid rumors. That's all rumors are. Stupid rumors." She said but there was something else nagging at her and when as she and Harry continued their awkward staring contest, the smile slowly faded from her face.

"Why are you so interested in Draco Malfoy?" He didn't answer and her expression grew more serious as she drew up the worst conclusions. Slowly, she lifted her chin off of her hand and reached across the table to put her hand over his. He didn't withdraw, but instead stared at her hand as if in thought.

"Harry...why are you so interested in him?"

"He's not a good person Ana. He's just like his father." And her fears were confirmed. She could feel herself becoming teary-eyed and so quickly blinked, trying to get rid of her watery eyes. Fortunately enough, Harry was still staring at her hand.

"You don't know that Harry."

"I know him better than anyone."

_I would bet money against that._

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_How dare he?! He doesn't know the first thing about him! That self-righteous, arrogant, little __**fucker**__!._

She hurled her textbook across the room, having it smash against the wall with a startling **BAM**. It attracted the glares of the few people still left in the common room and immediately Ana regretted her outburst, turning red from embarrassment before mumbling some sort of lame apology.

"_Accio textbook_." She whispered, clumsily catching the returning book with her left hand before quietly dragging herself to a more secluded corner of the common room. She sat down and fumed, occasionally scrunching her face and softly whacking the ground with her palm in protest.

"_He's not a good person Ana"_

As if he fucking knew. Harry Potter didn't know a goddamn thing about Draco Malfoy. How dare he make assumptions?! He didn't know how he was raised, or what how he liked his toast; Harry didn't know how Draco felt every time he went home for the holidays or received nothing but money as a gift; Harry didn't know that Draco really liked dogs and in fact was a little wary of cats-Harry didn't know anything.

And the most irritating part? The most hurtful part of it all?

Was the fact that Harry was right in a way. Draco was going to be just like his father. His father had made sure of that.

_Fuck him. Fuck that boy. Fuck that boy and golden crib he crawled out of._

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The thing about being frustrated is that you never really knew who you were frustrated with. Or who you were angry at.

She didn't know who she was angry at.

She was pissed at Harry for making assumptions.

She was pissed at Harry for being right.

She was pissed at Draco for being Draco.

And she was pissed at herself for being able to do nothing but let everything happen.

Slowly she turned over in her bed, reaching under her pillow to feel the leather-bound album that lay safely under a wrapped charm. She steadily pulled it out, clutching it to her chest and debating whether or not to open it.

_Not tonight._

And with that final thought, she returned the album under her pillow.

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He paced back and forth in the Common Room, his hand burning with pain from the recently active Dark Mark. His body was trembling not out of fear, but out of pure exhaustion. For the past several weeks he had been unable to get a single full night's sleep, every slumber being cut short by an attack of fear or sudden anxiety. The nightmares that had once been confined to the depths of his short slumbers were now creeping into his daydreams. Every flicker of a shadow made him tense and every person that walked by seemed to be staring at him. They were watching him. Everyone was watching. His every movement, his every breath-his every word. Nothing was safe.

Crabbe and Goyle who were once his convenient henchmen had become something to worsen his paranoia. Half of the time he wasn't sure whether they were just pretending to be brainless, or if they actually were brainless. Even though he believed they were stupid, he felt like they were spying on him.

_His spies. They are his spies._

Even though they never received the Dark Mark, that meant nothing. Draco knew better than most how it all worked. The endless cycle of being cursed. This curse that made his thoughts jagged and barely coherent to himself; his nights sleepless and his days foggy.

And this cabinet. This accursed cabinet. It wouldn't function the way he needed it to.

"FUCK!" He screamed as he slammed the cabinet door, the untouched apple sitting there as a reminder of his apparent failure. If he failed, he would probably be sentenced to death. Even if he didn't fail, he would probably be bound to die anyway. That was the only future that he could see. Regardless of what happened, he would die.

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"Miss Lee!" She snapped upright to a sitting position just in time to see her teapot rat fall off of her desk and smash into the ground. Professor McGonagall was not amused in the least bit and made sure Anabelle knew by docking off 5 points and pulling out a glare that rivalled Professor Snape's.

"S-sorry Professor..."

"Really now. Why did you sign up for this couse if you weren't going to pay attention?" She wasn't asking Ana to leave the course, but what Professor McGonagall didn't know was that Ana had already seriously contemplated dropping the course altogether.

"Sorry Professor..."

Professor McGonagall tutted and gave Ana one last disapproving look before continuing with the lesson, lecturing about splitting the teapot into two separate living creatures rather than just one. Ana was already zoning out, staring at the interesting pattern of grains in her wooden desktop. The grain of the wood ran vertically as opposed to horizontally like the rest of the desks in the room. For some reason, she had gotten the odd desk out.

Maybe it was because whoever made the desk had gotten lazy with this one. Maybe they had misjudged the size of the wood they were supposed to cut and rotated it to hide their mistake. Maybe it didn't matter because it was a stupid fucking desk that she was becoming mildly obsessive over.

"Class is dismissed."

_Already?_

Had she really been staring at her desk for that long? The last time she noted the time, there had been a half hour left of class. Shouldering her bag she got up to leave along with the rest of the students when Professor McGonagall placed a firm hand on her shoulder. Turning around she saw a tight lipped Professor who gave her this...this _look._ This judgmental..scrutinizing...look.

"Not you Miss Lee. I need to speak with you. Please come with me to my office."

"But Professor-"

"I will let Professor Slughorn know that I am excusing you from the first few minutes of his class. Now, come with me."

Ana didn't put up any further argument. There was no point in putting up an argument. So she trudged along, her feet dragging along the marble corridors as her mind began to fill with apprehension. There was something significant if Professoro McGonagall felt it necessary to pull her out of class, but Ana couldn't imagine that her recently abysmal grades really warranted a private chat. It wasn't like she had excelled prior. She definitely wasn't in Hermione Granger's league at least.

The heavy mahogany door creaked open and the magical candles spilled light into the room with her very first step. Without encouragement, Ana took the seat across from McGonagall's desk, wringing her hands in her lap and away from the professor's gaze. McGonagall sat in her chair and folded her hands on top of her desk, giving Ana that same disconcerting look that had made her anxious before. She looked at Ana as if she knew something that she wasn't supposed to know.

"Miss Lee, what in the world is going on with you?"

Her head snapped up and try as she might, she couldn't stop herself when her eyes widened in surprise. She felt like she hadn't slept properly in weeks and her edginess was starting to make her look mildly crazed.

"Ex-excuse me Professor..?"

McGonagall looked her up and down as if trying to decipher something, her gaze still so uncomfortable as it seemed to notice a lot more than Ana wanted. McGonagall sighed and placed her thin pair of glasses onto the bridge of her nose. There, her glasses sat daintily, looking as if they would fall off with the slightest nod of her head, but as Mcgonagall sorted through several parchments they miraculously stayed on. She pulled out five parchments of paper, each one having a very distinctively separate handwriting. She recognized Professor Slughorn's. McGongall picked one of them up and studied it.

"Your grades haven't dropped in just my class. Potions, Charms, Defense Against the Dark Arts, Herbology, Astronomy...and I hear that you are considering dropping Potions?"

"Yes Professor."

"At this rate, you won't be able to even graduate."

"Oh."

"Oh? Is that all you have to say for yourself right now? What about your future? Have you thought about what you will do after Hogwarts? Do you even care about your future at all?"

_What future?_

"Excuse me?"

Had she said that aloud? Ana sat up straighter, realizing that the boundaries between her thoughts and the words she spoke were actually becoming muddled in her exhaustion. Professor McGonagall looked surprised and seemed slightly unnerved herself, standing up and leaning over Ana with her hands on her desk.

"_What _future? Your future. Your entire future! You have the entire world awaiting you beyond these doors and all you can say is _what future?_"

Her chair scraped against the stone floor as Ana stood up suddenly, her eyes burning as tears welled up in her eyes. She didn't want this lecture-this overrecited speech coming from an old hag who was in denial that the school was beginning to crumble and that the future held nothing for her...and probably not for a lot of other students. There were so many other things to worry about, and McGonagall was worrying about her grades?

But as quickly as she had stood up, Professor McGonagall had stood up as well, her eyes sparkling with purpose as she regarded Ana. Her lips were pursed and her chin tilted upwards as she looked down at the enraged student. Ana wasn't sure what she had mentioned to accomplish by standing up so abruptly. She had originally planned on giving McGonagall a piece of her mind, but as she studied the intimidating teacher, she suddenly felt too timid. McGonalla stepped around her desk to stand across from Ana, her eyes holding a little less fury in them now.

"I am not pushing you to try harder so that you can get good grades. I am pushing you before you stop trying altogether. You think I am blind to my students? I may not know the details of what is going on in your personal life, but I can tell when a student is about to give up. I will not have my student giving up so easily-not when there is still so much to fight for. It may be dark now, but at the end of the darkness there is light. As part of the Gryffindor House, we are the champions of that light. Do not forget that."

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